and acquaintance. How well does the
couple know each other? What are their basic common
values? How do they adapt to differences in background,
religion, temperament, and interests? Can they meet these
differences with humor, mutual respect, patience, and
generosity? Do they have the courage and the willingness to go
together for outside guidance with any problem they are
unable to solve?
beliefs, feelings, aspirations. Do they see
marriage as a sacred relationship to be entered into with
appreciation of its spiritual basis? How do they propose to
meet their religious needs as a married couple? How do they
plan to make their marriage accessible to divine assistance?
Do they endeavor to hold each other in the Light?
marriage relationship. Do they think of themselves
as trusted and equal partners in marriage, sharing the
responsibilities and decisions? Are they supportive of each
other’s goals for personal growth and fulfillment? Do they
communicate their feelings and needs, their dreams and fears
to each other? Are they aware of the need for developing a
variety of other friendships that contribute both to individual
growth and to the marriage relationship? How do they view
their relationships with each other’s families and their
obligations toward society?
for the future. Have they considered together
whether or not they desire children — the problems as well
the joys they would bring, and the responsibilities for
nurturing and guiding them?
of prior commitments. Have they prior
obligations, personal or financial, which need to be met?
attitude of parents. What are the views of the parents
toward the prospective marriage? These should be learned
directly by the committee through personal conferences or
wedding. How do they view the wedding that is to
take place under the care of the Meeting? Are they familiar with
procedure? Do they appreciate the values involved as related
to its forms?